The challenges of parenting are often shared by the new parents or, more likely, the new grandparents. It’s a whole new world of responsibility for the young ones. There is no time for “daydreaming,” “indulging,” or “playing.” Everything must happen now, so you better get used to it! This does not mean, however, that young parents need to go over their heads setting up a structure and timetable for their lives. They just need to learn how to make the most of the little time they have on a daily basis.
One of the most common frustrations parents has when they bring home their first child is that they are overwhelmed with all the responsibilities. It doesn’t take long for a new parent to become overworked. If you look back at your own history, it probably took you quite some time to establish yourself as a reliable parent, until your kids were old enough to have their own set of adults around. You can’t expect your kids to be parents right away – it takes time and effort.
Young Parenting Problems
The same goes for you like the new mom or dad. It’s a big jump from being an employee to a parent. Try not to take it personally if your energy level seems to drain whenever you’re around your kids. You’ll come back more focused and less frustrated.
Another common complaint among new parents is feeling like they’re being taken for granted. Some people describe this feeling as, “being pampered while I’m supposed to be getting a fair break.” Don’t worry – kids growing up with single mothers or single fathers face this exact same problem, but they’re usually much more mature. Your kids will be growing up with their own set of responsibilities and they’ll be expecting you to be there for them. Expecting your kids to do the “roller coaster” of life just because you’re there is unreasonable.
Remember that as parents, you’re supposed to be the leader – not your child. Don’t get in their way. You need to keep an eye on what they’re doing (and be involved, if necessary). But at the same time, don’t put so much pressure on yourself that you become overbearing and overprotective.
A Much Ado
A very common parenting mistake is letting kids make all of the important decisions. Yes, it’s your job to watch over them, but don’t become a full-time parent and then assume everything will fall into place. Kids are unique and require certain influences and attitudes in order to develop and grow properly. While you may have spent years as a caregiver, it’s your role as a parent to encourage your kids to follow their own passions and goals.
One other thing that can cause a major problem in the middle of the night is talking to your kids’ doctors when you’re in a bad mood. You probably know how important sleep is for your kids’ physical and mental health, but did you also know that it helps you think better? Not only does good quality sleep lead to a more positive attitude, but it also means that you’re less stressed out when you come home. All it takes is one bad thought before your mood gets worse than you can handle. By having a calm and rational conversation with your doctor, you can feel better about yourself – which makes you a happier parent.
Dealing with young parenting problems can be challenging, but it doesn’t have to ruin your marriage. Take the advice you’ve just learned and use it to improve your relationship with your kids. Be prepared to communicate more – about anything from homework to school to where you’re going for lunch. Most importantly, just relax. Being involved and taking care of yourself will pay off for you in more ways than one.